Blogger Suicide

As I’ve noticed several recent views of my first post: this has piqued my interest as to how I intended my blog to develop and its six month journey since.

I’ve gotten braver since the beginning: I had no intention of letting my friends and family in. My blog was going to be totally anonymous. Then, one by one I sent out links to my posts and eventually posted my links to my facebook account, so much for anonymity.

My blog was going to be anonymous: It was going to be a save place where I could say what I pleased and be totally revealing as one would in a diary without concern that I would hurt anyones feelings. I wanted to do this because I feel my struggles and experiences as a woman and mother are universal. I’ve been told that I have an interesting perspective that others could relate to and through my writings gain insight.

As my audience expanded: With my subjects as my readers I’ve tip-toed through my experiences, dancing around the issues to spare feelings while stifling my own. The place I created for a voice that yearned to be heard became obscured. Falling short of my original intentions I sit here with my fingers to the keys feeling weak instead of brave. My posts have waned as have my stats while I dismiss topic after topic sparing feelings. Even as I write this I wonder…

Would this be considered blogger suicide?


About Aligaeta

I am a life time resident of NY State. A graduate of Nassau Community College, AA in Liberal Arts and Queens College, BA in English and Sociology. I am the mother of four children, the survivor of divorce, and I love to write in prose. This blog will be a record of my journey... destination unknown. Read more...
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3 Responses to Blogger Suicide

  1. Lisa Wields Words says:

    The simple answer is, yes. But I have a suggestion. Write. Just write. Don’t censor yourself. Your stories are universal. Yes, I know you want to preserve feelings, but I’m sure you also want to show your children that you are a woman with a voice, a woman who has the right to be heard. So don’t let this be blogger suicide, let it be your voice.

  2. jannatwrites says:

    I agree with Lisa – just write. One of the first posts of yours that I read had to do with loneliness you were dealing with around holidays. Your words conveyed your suffering and I felt compelled to comment. Had you censored that post, I don’t think it would’ve had the same effect.

    If you don’t write what your heart needs to and you’re worried about hurting feelings, what is the point of your blog anyway? I know, especially where kids are concerned, you have to be careful about what you reveal, but if you stick to your feelings rather than their actions, I think you can get by without violating their privacy.

    Good luck working this out…it is an interesting dilemma!

  3. Aligaeta says:

    Thank you both for the encouragement.

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